What to do on Bad Days

one thing I noticed every year is that when the holiday times come around there are people that just get more and more down they no longer like the holidays things that they used to do are no longer available to them and they just don't like this time of year anymore they're missing their kids and some of them are even missing their family members and friends because their children have been moved away and they got to travel somewhere where they don't know anybody just to get some time with their children so how do you deal with difficult times and what do you do on your bad days let's talk about that right now your days might be feeling

really down your life is not where you want it to be you're not who you want to be with right now things don't seem to be getting better no matter what you've tried and you're starting to dread each day so things seem impossible right and you get down and tired when you even think about trying to find your way out of this right how many of you can relate with that so what do you do when things get like this when they get this difficult if that sounds like you you're in the right place I'm sherry Palmer with fixed family courts and I'm going to give you some simple easy things that

you can do to use this time over the holidays more wisely or wisely okay so you've already lost a lot let's not focus on that because you you might have washed your equal time and rights to your child you probably lost your trust in the system you've lost your faith in those you've hired and paid a lot of money to so I'm going to list a few more here you've lost hope that things will ever get better your days with your career or your work might even be going downhill because you might be suffering health issues now and you may have developed more medical issues than you've ever had before you might even be

dealing with a disability that you never had you may have also lost family members or friends or maybe the ones that you lean on for support are going through tragedies of their own as well so and you might be unhappy politics so you're really struggling struggling right now I get it I've been there before so I'm not even gonna try to tell you that this isn't hard and that this isn't going to be hard towards changing things I'm just gonna share with you some things that I've done and I've seen work for others yes even including other parents so first you have to make it simple on yourself make it easy to accomplish things by

accomplishing a little bit at a time that means starting with your everyday life first and don't pile too much on your plate and expect to accomplish too much throughout your day in general already and we all know that now and the Family Court has also come along and piled even more on to your plate so you have to have a starting place or each day or your brain is just gonna start to give up on you it's gonna shut down it's to say that's it I've had enough I'm done you know what I'm talking about when you get too overwhelmed it's impossible to start fixing this pattern so we have to start with everyday some

simple things things you know will be quick and easy for you to accomplish so first plan to get up and get a cup of coffee or a cup of tea to force yourself to be able to accomplish the three simple easy tasks so I'm not talking about when you wake up you go oh my god I gotta write three motions and I'm gonna get something filed on Friday even though it's over the holidays and you know I've got all this stuff that I feel like I have to do and all of a sudden you're exhausted so let's start with three simple things okay set three simple things to accomplish set goals you can achieve so it might be you're

just gonna look up a template for the day I only spend maybe 10 minutes each day on the hard you know the hard parts of it and then the rest are simple tasks like maybe you're just going to write down a website that you want to read on 10 minutes a day so if you're not taking some action move towards your goals then you're also going to get more frustrated okay so what's the first rule set some simple goals how many set three it gets too easy to focus on the dark times and you forget that you can accomplish things positive things you forget that you still have choices right you're making a

choice to study these things you may say well it's not my choice I didn't want to do it I got dragged into it yes but you are making a choice to fight back you feel that's worthy you feel that that's how you get justice that's how you make changes so you do control your own choices so it may not seem like it when you keep getting hit with more and more restrictive orders or they try to punish you for working on it that happened to me I was actually told once when I had my children you know when the court confirmed keeping the children on standard or span its standard visitation with me what was the reason mom works on

court too much okay but let me tell you something you do have choices in your brain needs to shift to that perspective you have a choice on whether you give in whether you concede whether you say no to something whether you plan ahead whether you learn new things whether you fight back whether you give up okay so they're not the kind of choices you envisioned for your life right now but they are choices in order to get your life back on track you have to start moving forward somehow and it was denying the situation and not being prepared that got you here in the first place and it's convincing yourself that you have no power to change and that you

have change things and you have no choices and focusing only on the change is controlled by the court and it's not learning and moving forward that is keeping you stuck there so the first thing is start or the second after you set the simple task is you're going to start remembering your strengths and start directing your own life again it's okay to have a bad day or have bad days but if you keep having bad days day after day after day then it's time to stop that pattern and it's time to start setting the Regals every day to move forward by taking small simple actions okay so there are going to be

days you need some help because you might be like well I can't figure out what steps to set so you might need some support from other people and and this will help you change that perspective so that's where we come in showing you what you have control over still and how to capitalize on that and how to use it to propel you forward so ask yourself what should you be learning here you may feel like you don't have any personal power when that happens set down a learning map we can help with those things what can you learn right now to take your you closer to your goals we can help you

focus on those things did you know that the process of learning actually activates parts of your brains capabilities which allows it to grow and cope and be able to deal with these things a person that I like to listen to is very motivational he had a great quote Brendon Burchard he says a great time to start learning again is the times where you feel just beaten up and kicked by the side of the road it's that's the time to stand up and say okay what do I need to learn right now to advance my life to the next stage and he he describes those stages as when you're down that's the last stage so when you

start a new stage or you start a new stage every time you learn something how simple is that just to learn something simple and if you can't stand look at any topics that are related to the court right now then look up something else look up a positive quote if that gets you in the mindset to start working on this then that's the goal you set first maybe every day wake up do something positive maybe meditate for tenth five or ten minutes okay just start easy and slow don't jump into I'm gonna meditate and I'm gonna do it for two hours okay don't start like that because as soon as you fail it's something else you're going to

restart that same pattern of oh god nothing's working right my life's okay so we can help with that focus and that those topics that you need to spend a little time getting familiar with that's why people come to us they come to us because they can read our books take our online classes feel better even if the results are crappy even if they are someone who at the moment cannot even get their arguments into their court yet it's just that learning process that's helping their brain heal so I call it healing through learning so just learning gives them a power they forgot they had and they start doing a little better every day and they get ahead a

little bit more each time this is why we are releasing new segments and courses throughout the next several weeks we have a membership site and I haven't mentioned that in this video here so we have that so that you have somewhere to go and somewhere to heal through learning what does the membership do for you other than heal through learning give you a place to focus not make you guess at what you need to learn you can set your intentions you can map out your plans and live each day by making each choice intentional and when you live intentionally you stop wearing the victim hat you stop curling up in a ball

in the corner so I'm going to encourage all of you to become a member over these next couple of weeks and use this holiday time wisely if you're not already a member if you're already a member stay there and plan to watch and read for 10 minutes anything in the membership site each day right now write down any ideas that that reading gave you don't worry about organizing it yet or even how to use it yet just get the information into your head that's step one allow yourself the freedom to learn no pressure no expectations just absorb that's the first step what are the benefits you'll get your brain will shift into a new

perspective you will start to see Lucian's you never knew existed before which will give you more energy you'll ask new questions which will give you different results right if you keep asking the same questions you're gonna keep getting the same bad results outcomes but most of all you'll start to feel better because you finally have something concrete that validates what you are needing and feeling all along something that gives you a fighting chance that says you are important you do matter and you mean something and you are entitled to your way your abuse your beliefs your values and you have rights and you have the right to share those with your child you don't have to be

liked by any attorney judge or anyone working in the court system you'll be free to tell the Gallow the puzzle and to tell the judge no oh so baby steps alright you have something to do and somewhere to be over these next couple of weeks that's all in this membership site learning as much as you can and then next year you'll be ready for the step by step classes so you don't want to start the new year with an empty mind and not having any of this information so give yourself the best gift over these holiday weeks and that's the gift of healing through learning and I'll be right here the entire time for your

questions to keep you encouraged and to see you through this process so click on the link that I pose get that membership if you don't have it already and I'm waiting for you and if you haven't clicked that link yet let me tell you some of the benefits some more of the benefits that you get in this membership site 24/7 access to the information and materials all the webinars and videos in one place all the courses in one place you're not going to stress out searching different websites for things that you need all the books in one place annex so they'll digitally which means all of the books are searchable so you can

search a topic or a term that you decide you're interested in that you need right away you're under pressure you're in a rush and you need to find something quickly ice and then starting next year we're gonna start uploading step-by-step videos so those are going to become available for members at no extra costs this membership is less than a dollar a day you will have more support because we're gonna start putting Q&A videos in the membership site that are focused on your questions so you're gonna have access to many webinars and workshops for free you're gonna see new materials and book content first before we release it to the public general public and

you're gonna get to be in some of those workshops and webinars furs and you'll get special invites when we're traveling and we stop to do event you'll be invited and get VIP tickets and small group access and we will consider the topics that you send us first for choosing topics that we teach additionally in the membership site as bonuses so let's make this holiday time productive click on the link join the membership and I'll see you on the other side